What are People Worth?

Recently, on one of the many tangents my mind goes on each day, I began thinking about what things we value and why we value them. Things such as food and water are obvious: we value them highly because we need them. However, there are some things we deem as valuable that we do not necessarily "need". Gold and diamonds are things we do not need, but we typically value them highly. Some of us collect and value things such as baseball cards and model cars, things that others may find no value in at all.

Value is an essential part of relationships.

Assigning value in life is not restricted to just "things". Relationships could not exist without value. If we valued no one, we would isolate ourselves. The fact that we socialize at all indicates that we value others enough to use our time in that way. We value certain people, for whatever reason, so we engage them in conversation and want to be around them. We value some more than others, of course, and it would be deceptive to think otherwise.

Value can fluctuate quickly when its based on getting something in return.

When we start looking at "value" and how it applies to relationships, we can see some of the same characteristics mentioned already in valuing objects. Sometimes we value a relationship with someone because they have something to offer us. Similar to how we value food and water, we may feel that we need certain people. It may be due to connections they have that offer us something we want. It could also be more due to an emotional connection that we rely on in an attempt to meet some personal need. In both cases, when the other person stops offering what we want, we devalue them rather quickly like spoiled food that we cannot use anymore.

Others do not lose their value when we do not expect something from them.

Sometimes value in a relationship has nothing to do with obtaining something from the other person. Like picking up a seashell on the beach and admiring it, we find people in our lives that we value simply because of who they are. There's something about them we find captivating. A seashell offers nothing more than its beauty. It is what it is. A person we enjoy being around can be the same way. We just love and respect who they are. We value them highly, even when they have nothing to offer us but themselves.

It appears value can be divided up into two categories.

In the context of relationships, we either value someone because of what they can give us, or we value someone because of who they are. The truth appears to be that when it is based on what they can do for us, we do not value the person at all...only what they can give us. It may be a financially lucrative business connection they have, a talent they have that is advantageous to us, an emotional high that they are able to produce in us, a chance a child gives us to live vicariously through them, or some other thing a person can bring to the table that we want. When they no longer satisfy our requirement, we no longer see the need to continue pursuing the relationship. When we value someone simply for who they are, that value stands up to the great challenges that come along in any relationship because the value we place on that person is not based on selfish gain.

Where do we find our own value?

Just as we can base the value of objects and people on something stable or unstable, we can do the same with ourselves. If I see my value only in what I can offer others, it fluctuates. I go through highs and lows like a rollercoaster, dependent upon how well I perform. When I can find something more substantial and honest regarding my value and trust that source, I am much better off. What better source to inquire about my value than the One who created me?

One cool thing about God is that He is not like us when it comes to valuing people. He does not make the mistake of valuing us because of what we can do for Him. He chooses to love us, knowing we can never offer anything more than ourselves to Him. That love is seen clearly in the life and death of Jesus. He offered everything in the relationship He pursues with us. Our value is based on that love He has for us. When we embrace that love, our value is no longer in question.